8/13

chuck berry an i can't stand the noise apples make. damn these teeth, chew chew take all your mind until you can't get one thought out. i see my son ailways smiling, don't you see the roof pulling up, the empty bank account the fear of the lay off line? the mail industry is a dinosaur. is there fifty years left for me?
we got my fellow whites banging and hollering undercover of health about the fear of a black president. why? it hasn't been about color since there was a upper class an you weren't one of them. credit hummer elegant mall dinners and family mastercardcations are not indications of being made.
all these creaking giant samesions. big square identical giants. well we made it in our lavender trim 2500 box next to the blue trim box but we have the bay windows in the bedroom so don't you see our higher class?
an still they come where did all this luxury come from? what did i miss? not everyone's in management, right?
but he's only fifteen months so what's he got to do but laugh smile and shit himself.
i do the orthodox prayer an fast but without writing i am empty a life masturbated. all vision an no prophecy.
before he soared for nike was jordan tortured by the gift of basketball?
i am tortured by words and tortured by vision and tortured by reality imposed by the lash of the other oarsman.
ah wife wants date night
ah big brother wants my eyeballs
ah stomach wants to grumble
ah beer to be beered
ah son to be taught and led around
listen don't ever give up, you can always get it back but it ain't coming back all the way.
i chew i stare the window through i wait for the work whistle for the bedtime clock for the stomach alarms for the toilet and all this hope for a writing future slips through my fingers like sand.
character story dialogue slip slipped slops to the gutter of my mind washed away replaced by football season.
sleep work chew shit repeat. suffer on!s